My fiance ‘Jeremy’, and I are planning on a destination beach wedding at one of Sarasota’s beaches next June, we just started planning. So… Jeremy just informed me that he plans on wearing a tux. Sorry, but that just doesn’t seem right. He’s saying that my wedding dress is formal so he wants to wear a tux. Aren’t beach weddings informal? Should I change my chiffon wedding gown to something less formal? I’m confused, Please Help!
Hi Ashley, we’ve heard the ‘Tux’ question on a number of occasions, don’t worry we’re here to help. Yes you’re correct, beach weddings are an informal event, but their’s more to consider than just the event style.
Let me start by saying that most all brides want to wear a wedding dress on their big day, whether it’s an indoor formal wedding or an outdoor ‘beach type’ informal event. Likewise, the groom wants to look good, feel good too.
BTW: you’ll look fabulous in that chiffon dress Ashley, no need to change!
Wedding Dresses & Traditions
Bridal traditions and customs don’t allow for much leeway beyond the ‘style’ choices produced by wedding dress & gown designers. So…choices for the bride are from a few available gowns designed for more informal or outdoor events.
But…at the end of the day, it’s still a wedding gown and [won't/may/will] be considered ‘formal’ attire by your mate – How does your mate feel about the “Wedding Dress?”
Guy’s Traditional Attire
Customs and traditions are less ridged for the groom and have been for awhile. It’s perfectly acceptable today for the groom to wear a ‘Tommy Bahama’ style shirt, white linen pants and sandals at his beach wedding. But…the truth is that many guys want to be dressed in a traditional ‘Tux’ for the wedding.
How often do guys get to look good in a tux? Not a lot!
Beach and other outdoor ‘informal’ type weddings happen every day here in Florida where the groom is wearing a formal tuxedo and that’s ok, it’s his choice. But the majority of men’s beach wedding attire isn’t a full blown tux, it’s something less formal, definitely eclectic and ranges from the very casual pants and shirt, to a suit with tie & vest, no jacket. Their are ‘No Rules,’ which can cause confusion and disagreement between couples on the subject.
Sit down with your fiance and talk about it. Find out his motivation for wanting to wear a tuxedo. Very simply, does Jeremy want to wear a tux or does he feel that he needs to ‘dress up’ to the level of your wedding gown? Also - See the list of Bullet points below to talk about.
Remember, wedding planning can and probably will bring out some disagreements between you both. So, find common ground, a place where you both compromise a little and are still happy. You’ll both need to do this for a life-long happy marriage so you might as well start here and now.
Beach Wedding Bullet Points to Consider
- What will the average temperature be at your beach wedding? Look up weather data online to find out if you’re unsure.
- Will the groomsmen like wearing tux’s on a hot beach? Please; Be considerate of everyone in the wedding party.
- Is this a first marriage for both? First marriages can be as formal as you want, after the first it’s all casual.
- Cost to rent a tux to wear once or buy a suit and wear it many times?
- Popular: Suit with nice shirt, tie & vest – No Jacket.
- Consider your reception location; formal – informal, indoors – outdoors? Note: Many ‘Casual’ beach ceremonies end up with very formal receptions, Will your wedding ceremony attire be appropriate at a formal reception?
- Light colors & materials are best at beach & other outdoor wedding venues, dark colors trap the sun’s heat.
1 Thing to Always Do
This might sound corny but; if you both communicate with each other face to face, with love in your hearts & calm voices… happiness, the ultimate goal, will be at your doorstep.
Last Thing – Beach Wedding Basic
After the ceremony and before picture time with the photographer, have someone in the wedding party assigned to handing you both a bottle of cold water to drink from. You’ll be dehydrated from the sun & heat and won’t even know it.